What do you think i should do? or whats going on? im in love but wow...help!?
I've been with my boyfriend 3yrs. Known each other longer. Have an almost 2yr old. He stated at start he loved me& never felt this strong about anyone. He always seemed truly in love & I trusted him...even with trust issues.
I moved 800miles to start my life with him. He wanted a child& I questioned it but bc I'm in love wanted a child...I've wanted marriage but don't think he does at all. Right away I wasn't sure...but we had a kid. That's forever!!!
I love my little man. He's a gift and very precious but wish the life I had with his daddy was different. I found out while pregnant he had an emotional affair. He didn't nor ever will see it as cheating. Although she was 10yrs older than I. Personally attacked me! & they spoke about sex & meeting up...
He said they never had sex. He stated he doubted it would have gotten to that point. But he knew it was wrong! Yet he claims he didn't know better...he's not that stupid. He hid it for a reason! Bad mouthing me & claiming I didn't respect him.
He's a film maker... but has no real full time or even part time job! I run a very busy childcare & sell products for extra $ on the side. I was a fulltime manager at a busy company but had no time for my son. I couldn't do that--I'm making triple the income with both jobs...yet he continues to have no job.
I even said. Recently... put your work/mind into this career of yours. Although since he bad mouthed me a few yrs back I have issues supporting him fully. Plus the last 5yrs I haven't seen that he's gone to far... he would argue.
He has an older son with his "wife" but hasn't been with her 8yrs. Once I started asking questions realized they were NOT divorced. Although he swore he divorced years ago... but on paper!
He pays no current support or in yrs. He went on to say howw she's gotten lots of $/support in the past. Idk? Does it matter?& it shouldn't be my business but I too take care of the kid & have often been asked to watch him so he can "film".
Now with no job...
Sorry needed to add more- so with no job... he does classes M,W,F and typically late. He used to get home at 9:15pm on the dot then started showing up 15-20 mins later, I asked he said "sorry" what he typically says. And I know he's there, b/c I've called to talk to him.
He says--well I make a little extra cash. He makes $20.00 or basically $60-100 a wk, when they pay him. Yes that's a part-time job, maybe... but it's more something he enjoys. All I've asked for is love, respect and communication- that if he runs late to let me know.
He constantly sets up "meetings" or whatever with friends/ or people to meet them, says yes before he asks my plans. We have ONE car--mine, the one I brought with. I've been screwed a few times... and it's only a matter of calling to say " Hey hun...running a few mins late" something! so I told him it's RESPECT.
So I cook, I clean, I work, I take care of our son... you name it basically. I do it-I dress up for him, I look good no matter, I do my nails
Basically he feels I have to many rules and don't respect him, but I don't ask for anything but love and respect and him to communicate.
he does what HE wants... So how is that rules or me being disrespectful to him??
he always says he's so in love-- that I think negative or what I want. sounds like when he said the cheating was in my head-and it wasn't!
but swears to god, he's changed... I just want to see movement not just words.
he says he's not using me, or it's not that he's comfortable that he truly does love me.
it's hard to believe...
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